Friday, 1 August 2014

10 ways to start labour off: Myth or not?



The wife is now 5 days overdue. That's right 5! 5 whole days. 5 days of frustration, disappointment, annoyance, irritation, discomfort, anger and anything else of that nature. And that's just me! 

We've sat through NCT classes, NHS classes, midwife appointments and surfed the world wide web clueing ourselves up on how to bring on labour. How to get it going. How to start labour going. How to rev up the engine to put it in dad terms. And I'm telling you now - babies will come when they are ready to come regardless of any of the following! 

#1Curry

The wife has been vegetarian for 35 years and hasn't ever touched a curry. The closest thing she's come to a curry, in fact, is smelling my curried beer breath... until now! 3 takeaways filled with balti's, chicken tikka and madras, not to mention the onion bahji's and still NO BABY! 

The theory is that a spicy curry stimulates the tummy, therefore the womb. 

#2 Walking

I made her walk the 1/2 mile to the curry house... and back... and still NO BABY! We've also walked round the block, the park, up there friggin stairs! 

The theory is that being upright means gravity helps the baby push down on the cervix. This action can also help release the hormone, oxytocin, which can induce labour. 

#3 Pineapple

Chopping up a pineapple is never really worth effort but the thought of the possibility it might also end in a baby was enough to encourage me through. I chopped, she ate and still NO BABY! 

The theory is that pineapple contains the enzyme bromelian which is thought to help soften the cervix. Whoever these people are, they should stop having 'thoughts.' 

#4 Hypnosis

We went to see Derren Brown live last weekend - arguably the worlds best hypnotist. He didn't work his magic, mainly because I didn't get the chance to ask, but anyway, still NO BABY! (I did pretty well at disproving psychics though, not that he claims to be psychic!) 

The only evidential theory with this is that it does make you feel more relaxed and less anxious - if you believe in it. 

#5 Reflexology

Despite finding the towns best reflexologist and her grinding away at the wife's induction points, still NO BABY! 

The theory is that every part of your body is linked to a point in your feet - or something like that. 

#6 Sex

*ahem... still NO BABY! 

#7 Nipple Stimulation

ditto

#8 Bouncing on a birthing ball

Any more ball bouncing and she'll be threatening Michael Jordon for the all time greatest basketball player! (Maybe she's doing it wrong?) Still NO BABY! 

#9 Apparently - wearing your best knickers (sod's law says waters break in them)

How on earth would me wearing her best knickers help her start labour? I mean, I do wear them and it does help me but labour? ...still NO BABY! 

#10 Acupuncture

Sticking pins into your body in order to stimulate the energy within your body to act on a specific organ or function? I think we'll wait... 

What worked for you? 
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Thursday, 31 July 2014

Terry Towel - What the What???




Is this even a post? Have we bumped into Marty Mcfly from Back to the Future who has sent us back to times before disposable nappies? Surely they stain? Surely they smell? Can you actually get them white again? Maybe someone should invent brown Terry Towel nappies? The electricity bill must be through the roof from machine washing? Don't they leak? Is a safety pin not unsafe? Will using safety pin pass the Red Cross health & safety requirements? So many questions about something that seems so ridiculous when you can simply buy pull ups... 

Yet I'm finding myself typing out instructions on how to "do" a terry towel nappy. Can someone stop me please? Seriously...this is just a waste of time. 

Step 1



Fold your piece of fabric / towel in half to make a rectangle that looks like this... about 30cm X 70cm maybe. 








Step 2



Then fold in in half to make a square. Make sure the top layer is accessible... 








Step 3



Take one of the corners, I don't really know which but try and follow the knee's in the picture. (The wife has got nice knees...it's why I married her!) 








Step 4




Then turn it over... I'm just repeating what they wife said! 








Step 5




Fold the top layer in on itself in small rectangles? (Yeah, I don't understand that either.) But at least it then looks like a pretty cool fighter jet. One of those Black Stealth bombers... cool eh! 







Step 6 




Put your small cuddly T-rex, I mean, baby with it's legs / feet at the narrow end of the towel. (That small yellow bit is the T-Rex's head.) Then pull the thick middle bit up through the legs and hold at the baby's waist line. 






Step 7



Wrap the 'wings' round the waste... and... 









Step 8 



Fasten with a very dangerous and dubiously named 'safety' pin. Note the direction of the safety pin head. This is important because it means... erm...









Right there you go... now you know... I know... we all know... none of us are going to do it... and I'm off to waste more time counting my spare change or watching Big Brother or talking to the wife about the state of the road surfaces. 

*I've just shown this to the wife to proof read, as I actually can't spell anything, and she's informed me that there is actually an insert that you 'throw away'... is that not just a disposable nappy? Why are we then wrapping it in a towel? Has the world gone mad! 


Legend!

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Wednesday, 30 July 2014

My First Book - Product Review



Have you ever asked yourself the question, 'I wonder what my child will be when they grow up?' Will they be intelligent, sporty, handsome, funny, business like? All of the above maybe? 

Well, if you want your baby to be a member of Mensa  then these books will give your baby a kick start in the right direction. They are award winning for their innovation in cognitive development of babies. In fact, it's probably best I quote the author herself: 


"The My First Book series includes four delightful board books, specially dedicated to infant’s developmental growth milestones: vision, memory, speech, and social skills. Each of the four books ... include high contrast, black and white and bold color illustrations which promote visual and speech stimulation. Each picture is accompanied by a simple word that baby will love repeating and which will help their speech development. They are not just picture books or bedtime stories but rather activity books conceived to stimulate a baby’s senses."


It's no secret that reading to a baby is essential for their development and growth and has a huge impact. In fact, the impact is greater than you probably first think. Reading to a baby stimulates the baby's senses and builds listening and memory skills. Above all of this, however, it encourages time bonding with your baby. 
Clearly, it is never too early to read to a baby. I will certainly be using the My First Book series to read to my baby. After all, I wouldn't mind it at all, if he were to be a little child genius, rocket scientist, astronaut, or a chess champion... 
Possibly as interesting however, the author was previously an award winning mountaineer! I like to think of myself as someone who likes the mountains and the fact that I have a 'Man VS Mountain race coming up in September, means that I am perhaps as interested (if not more) in the authors previous career. 

So being a successful mountaineer, combined with incredible books focused on baby cognitive development, supporting senses and bonding the My First Book Series gets an official Dad Network Star rating of 5 / 5 stars and wins our award of recommendation. 




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Monday, 28 July 2014

Due Date Frustration



Massive isn't she? Of course I mean the bump - look at those skinny little pigeon wings she calls arms! She'd be better of with a cocktail stick as an arm. 

Today's the day. The predicted date of arrival! Our due date is today; 28th July 2014. This is a bizarre feeling; mainly of expectation, frustration, irritation, moving towards bitterness and good dose of impatience; and as I thrash this post out on the keyboard I still have 5 hours left of hope. 

I remember the moment the midwife and sonographer sat in a room with us and gave us the date; a date a good 8 months ahead of time. I also remember sitting in NCT lessons and being constantly reminded that only 5% of babies arrive on their due date. It's as if a couple of professional 'ish' people stabbed the dark and hit 28th July 2014 as a ball park figure knowing that only 5% of the time, they get it right. And yet, we place such high regard on this date. 

I don't like being late at the best of times... so having this date thrust upon me was the single most unhelpful thing the midwife has done. Closely followed by telling my wife that she shouldn't wear flip flops! 

My argument here is that I don' think we should have due dates but instead have due months. It would be far more useful (and far less disappointing, frustrating and antagonising) if the midwife had said, "yeah, he'll probably be born in July sometime." Now, I know what you're thinking, what about those babies that are due dangerously close to the end or beginning of a month? Well, I think that with a slight manoeuvre, and quite frankly, a better use of the words 'early' & 'late' we could be on to a problem solved! 

Here's my plan, layed out in a dad, logical, methodical way: 

- If your old due date is in the middle of a month then you just claim that month as your due month. That way 2 weeks early or 2 weeks late, pretty much covers it. 

- If your old due date is at the end or beginning of a month, you have "late 'July'/early 'August'" as your due month. 

Simple! We ditch due dates and introduce due months. 

If you have any doubt what your due month is, just pop me a comment with your dissatisfying due date and I'll be happy to clarify it for you. 
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Joie i-anchorSafe system - Product Review



I think I am living proof that it is possible to spend almost 9 months deciding on a car seat. Second only to the push chair, a car seat is, typically, the dads favourite arena of play. It is a headache if I'm honest, especially now there all these new regulations and laws about which way the baby is facing. When I was a baby my parents had one basic car seat, belted with the lap belt into the car that lasted me 5 years...there was no fluff and what not...and I survived. It was probably something like this: 



Joie is a great brand. You can tell whether it's a good brand or not by the website. http://www.joiebaby.com/anchor- This is a fabulous website with videos and everything so they must be brilliant. I jest, but seriously, it's a great brand. They sent us the i-anchorsafe system. It's basically a base, with isofix capabilities and a car seat that sits perfectly onto the base. There is also a car seat that you can purchase as well, but I'll come more on to this in a little while. Here's a very helpful picture: 



The Base: 



The base is heavy, which to me indicates it is well made. It is similar to most other isofiix bases, with 2 prongs out the back that fit through the seat and clip into the fixings on the car. Now, I must pause here for a moment and let out some frustration... Nissan decided to locate the Qashqai's isofix fixings 3 inches too low. There is no way on this earth that they are usable. AAAAHHHH! I'm thinking a trip to the local Nissan garage is in order. This did mean however, that I need to belt the base in using the seat belt and this was very easy to do.
The instructions were clear and accurate. They also have a video incase the wife is doing it... jokes! The arm unfolds and sits on the base of the footwell. Joie have a green light system that when installing the base and car seat, all the 'lights' must turn completely green showing you that everything is correctly installed. Very helpful indeed! 
Another great thing about this base is that is has 7, that's right 7, different reclining positions. And each and every position is very easily found using the orange lever which, when pulled upwards, allows the smooth movement to your new position. This is great for if you want your baby/child to sleep or sit upright. Good thinking Joie! 




The Seat: 


The seat boasts that it can be used from newborn all the way to a child roughly aged 4. That is a massive selling point to me because I do not want to be forking out for a new car seat every 6 months. The way it does this is in 2 ways. 

#1 The seat can attach to the base rear facing (for when you have a newborn - 15 month old) and can stay rearward facing for up to approximately 4 years old. At any point it can be forward facing to suit your needs. What a great idea and is unique! The quick release button allows you to take the seat off and turn it round with ease and speed. Not that you'd ever need to this with speed, but I like doing things with speed...it's what I do...much to the wife's irritation. *ahem* 

#2 The seat comes with 3 inserts that you simply take out when your child outgrows them. The restraints don't change, just the padding inserts. The belts are big enough and have enough adjustment to cater for all the phases. This again, makes this seat a winner to me! 

The straps clip together very easily, so when it's pouring with rain and you need to strap them in quickly, it's easy to do so. They are also very easily adjustable using a small button. There is one other addition to the seat which is a little annoying but nothing you can do about it. The roll bar has to be attached. I guess most people use a carry car seat and then change to one of these when a roll bar isn't need. (Carry car seats use the carry handle as a roll bar.)

This needs to be a consideration. This car seat does not come off the base and straight onto your pram. It is not part of a travel system in that capacity. If you want that, you would need to purchase the Gemm infant seat from Joie. Because of this, you need to weigh up what you want out of your car seat. We like this one because the advice we received was a newborn shouldn't be in a car seat for any longer than 1 hour 30 mins and that time can run away with you if you drive into town and move the car seat to the pram without moving the baby. That baby will be in a car seat position for a long time. With this seat, you would have to lift the baby out and put it into the separate pram. 

The seat is incredibly well padded giving ample support to the baby's body and it meets all the necessary standards, including the new changes. It comes in a small range of colours. This is the first UK government certified i-side R129. It's also side impact certified so it really does cover all necessary requirements. For us, this is one of the best we've come across. It meets out needs and ticks our boxes. If we did want the Gemm car seat, we could get it but we're going to see how we on to start with. 

We've looked at a lot of car seats, and really, what with the huge amounts of traffic on the road, there isn't another piece of baby paraphernalia as important as this. It's worth spending time looking at but this one for us was the best we found. I can't wait to take my little boy home in his Joie car seat. 

The Joie i-anchorSafe system receives an official Dad Network star rating of 5 / 5 stars and receives the award of recommendation. 



























https://twitter.com/Joie_Baby

https://www.facebook.com/JoieBaby
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Sunday, 27 July 2014

Free Giveaway - Children's Books - Adam's Cloud


You won't find a bedtime story book with a more important message or a more inspiring story and we're giving them away. Adam's Cloud is a selection of moving, well written and truly inspiring children's books. The Dad Network is working together with Adam's Cloud to promote these wonderful books and you have the chance of winning a set of 4 books

Adam was a little boy who died, suddenly, at the age of 4 from a brain tumour. It was this tragic event that inspired Benji, Adam's dad, to begin the venture. Benji felt compelled to take his memories of Adam and use them to give a very important message to the world about the importance of love, laughter and play within the family. 

Benji said this, "I spent so much time trying to create magical moments for Adam to remember his childhood with fondness. I never once thought that these memories were actually for me to remember and cherish the short time I had with Adam. 

If every child gets an extra 10 minutes of play time, an extra hug and kiss and are told that they are loved at the end of each day, well, that's OK."

These books are all about spending time with your children and creating magical moments with them. There is no greater message that could be delivered, which is why we were so keen to help Adam's Cloud promote these books. 

To enter the competition (and this isn't really about a competition, it's a just a bonus) all you need to do is leave a comment under this post describing a 'magical moment' you've had with your child. It could be just a brief moment of pure joy or a longer moment that will stay with you forever. Feel free to comment anonymously, but be aware that we won't be able to consider you for winning as we need a valid way of contacting you. 

The competition will be running from Sunday 27th July 00:01 until Sunday 3rd August 23:59. 

The message of this book is crucial and one that The Dad Network believes, whole heartedly in. Dads should do their very best to carve out time to spend with their children and create opportunities for those 'magical moments.' Reading a bed time story is a perfect tool to do this. Please go and look at the website for Adam's Cloud, order a book and see if you like it. I guarantee you will. 





It goes without saying that Adam's Cloud books receive an official Dad Network star rating of 5 / 5 stars and receives our award of recommendation. 


TERMS and CONDITIONS:
  1. There is no cash alternative.
  2. The winners will be contacted by email and receive the books via post once an address has been provided. 
  3. Entries will only be deemed valid if a valid email address/contact method is provided.
  4. The winners will be selected at random from all valid comments posted by 11:59pm on 3rd August 2014.
  5. The judges decision is final and no correspondence will be entered into.
  6. The winner's names will be published on this site.
  7. The 'magical moments' comments will be shared with Adam's Cloud to use as they wish. (Names won't be included) 


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Friday, 25 July 2014

Harry & Jack's Adventure Packs - Product Review



WARNING: THIS IS NOT A BABY CARRIER... But if it were, it'd be the coolest, most amazing baby carrier around! Take that Baby Bjorn!

This is however, a fantastic rucksack aimed at children of all ages. Obviously, our little Rex is far too little to have a rucksack so we tested it with friends and family. They fell in love with it whether they were 3 years old or 9! (Despite them recommending them for 3 - 6) In fact, it was nearly world war 3 when we had to peel it away from one of them! 


These rucksacks are inspired by the creators 3 imaginative and adventurous children. They are designed to promote imaginative play, which, lets face it, is dying a death in 21st Century England what with the increase in small screens with flashing lights. I think these are great for that very reason let alone the practical benefits. 

#1 They are small enough for a small child to carry but large enough to actually put something in it. We used our one for a school trip which required us to pack everything under the sun and it fitted well. (Especially in those rocket blasters.) It has a bottle holder and secret compartments for treats...or stuff! (Can you tell that, actually, I think I'd quite like to use this bag?


#2 This bag is well made and seems durable. The zips are good quality and the straps are comfortable. The zip around the top of the rocket blaster however is a little fiddly when you open that compartment fully. The children struggled to close the zip at this point. 

#3 How great is it for your kids to have a bag they are excited about using and they can keep all their 'tut' (I was going to say crap...) in it and carry it themselves. 
"Daddy, can I take my toy cars?"
"Sure thing, pop them in your bag. You're carrying it!" 



These are great packs that inspire imaginative and creative play. They are currently just about to release a scuba diving pack which looks fabulous. Perhaps another consideration is that they are quite stereotypically appealing to boys. This does seem to be their target market however, which is fine, but they might want to produce something more traditionally girl orientated too. I'm not saying that girls won't like this and I'm a strong advocate for boys and girls not having 'set' toys, but it is worth thinking about. 


http://www.harryandjacks.co.uk



Harry & Jacks Adventure Packs receive an official dad Network star rating of 4.5 / 5 stars. 



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Wednesday, 23 July 2014

Should you wear a bikini at 39 weeks pregnant?



Well, as a dad, I shouldn't... This one really does split opinion! 

We went swimming at 39 weeks pregnant and the wife wore a bikini. Unbeknown to me, being as observant as a mole, people were giving the wife odd looks. I might even go as far as saying 'disgusted' looks. Prior to going, it didn't even enter my mind that people might be offended by a pregnant women in a bikini and post recieving this looks, I have no idea what their problem is! 

I looked into this a little further and found that the internet is littered with people having major issues with pregnant women wearing bikinis. Poor Tori Spelling had a torrid time after she was caught on camera sporting a skimpy swim suit bikini whilst being heavily pregnant. Here's a few quotes which might make you think: 

“Too much showing. Not suitable for a pregnant mom with a seven-month-old.”
“Ewww. She’s pregnant! Cover that bump up! No one wants to see that!!”
“NOT motherly AT ALL. In future years she will surely regret that unflattering picture. COVER up girl!"
“That suit is barely suitable for a non-pregnant woman let alone a pregnant one!"
“Have a little more modestly when you’re pregnant!!! Geez!!!"
“She’s pregnant and wearing this? She’s just trashy and looks like a hooker!”
I couldn't believe my eyes when I was reading various different comments and opinions so I thought that I would locate the worst/best of what I found and then address it myself. 
"Gross if noticeably pregnant. A big belly may be awe-inspiring, kiss-worthy, life-creating and rhetorical thing of beauty but in a bikini it just does not look good. I get the heebie-jeebies from seeing any bared pregnant midriff."
Gross? Have they actually just said it's gross? If we're going to start heading down the slippery slope of what looks gross in a bikini (and far more of an issue) I would lean more towards the obesity crisis in the world as pipping pregnancy to the post. If we're talking about what doesn't look good in a bikini, pregnancy in my mind is way down the list. This person doesn't like it, but what about hideous tattoos that are on display or extra skinny women showing off their ribs or size 20 women sporting a piece of dental floss! I think this issue needs an element of perspective. 
"Not everyone wants to see bulging belly flaunted in their face. Princess Kate Middleton, she carried herself with grace. These people who wear bikinis or skin tight shirts...now that's gross." 
Princess Middleton probably has a very long list of do's and don'ts and I'll bet a large sum of money that doing anything controversial is firmly on the don'ts list. I'd love to ask her what she would think about this. Not everyone wants smoke blown in their face, not everyone wants to hear people swearing, not everyone wants to see soft porn splattered all over our advertisements. This person should understand we live in a society where people are free to do as they choose and in my opinion, a pregnant women in a bikini is again, low down the list of priorities. 
"My mother...even complains if a pregnant women wears a tight top showing her belly, damn they should cover themselves up."
There is a point to make here about tradition. Historically women felt more comfortable within society to cover their bumps up. There are even accounts of women not leaving the house when they started to show as it was deemed inappropriate. Yet, it was during these times that women had a raw deal; they weren't allowed to vote or speak freely. Times have changed!
"I think it's inappropriate and not attractive at all." 
Attraction! Is this really the point here? I don't find 99% of the population attractive and yet they can wear bikinis without disgusted looks. Physical attraction is such a personal thing that can be dependant on so many things. Hair colour, eye colour, size, age, ethnicity, fashion etc etc... when I find someone unattractive I find it pretty easy to control myself from issuing disgusted looks. 
"Pregnant bellies are just as attractive as a massive beer gut. Actually less so if they have that nasty poppin'-out belly button. That makes me gag."
Really? Firstly, most massive beer guts are on men and men aren't the subject of conversation here. Secondly a massive beer gut is caused by an unhealthy lifestyle, which must be considered when thinking about attraction and thirdly pregnancy is a natural part of life and creation, a beer gut isn't! I'm unsure how this person managed to avoid kicking themselves in the face after writing that comment! 
"Can't a pregnant women wear a regular bathing suit rather than a bikini?" 
Correct me if I'm wrong from looking at this with my male, logical, problem solving hat on but surely when you have a huge bump wearing something that doesn't effect that area is far more practical, comfortable and sensible? The trouble I've had with the wife and her wardrobe, it was actually refreshing for her to wear something that wasn't "too tight for the bump" or "won't fit over the bump." I think bikinis are a bloody good idea for pregnant women! 
Ok, so as a dad, here's my conclusion. I have no idea what the issue is here. Looking good is so subjective and opinion based that it can't really be a valid argument. The fact that generations ago it was fashionable to hide your bump as it was deemed inappropriate can't be argued because so many things within society have changed since then. And as I've said, bikinis are far more practical for pregnant women to wear...especially when heavily pregnant. 
For me, there is no issue. I find the wife attractive in her bikini and I would also find her attractive in any other kind of swim suit. I want her to feel comfortable in herself and in her body and if she is, happy days. If your comfortable wearing what your wearing then people have no right to give out dirty looks, comments and anything else. The Dad Network has spoken! 


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Partners of Miscarriage Sufferers 'Ignored'



The UCL and MIscarriage association have released some brand new research into the partners of miscarriage sufferers; mainly dads. I could write a huge long piece abut all this, but in all honesty, it's probably better if I just post the press release for you to read. It's fascinating, resonating and begging for something to be done. That's why the Miscarriage Association have begun a campaign called "Partners Too"


UCL and Miscarriage Association Press Release 

Embargoed until Monday 21 July 2014, 00.01 UK time

Partners of miscarriage sufferers ‘ignored’

Case studies, multimedia and interviews available: see notes to editors

The partners of women who miscarry often feel invisible, ignored and sidelined during and after miscarriage – and unable to talk about their own feelings of loss and pain – according to new findings from UCL and the Miscarriage Association.

This represents a very large group of people who may require additional help and support, as more than 1 in 5 pregnancies end in miscarriage and a further 2% are ectopic – when a fertilised egg implants itself outside the womb.

The Miscarriage Association is today launching a public awareness campaign, ‘Partners Too’, to highlight the issue and direct those affected to sources of help and information.

UCL researchers carried out in­-depth interviews with partners, who reacted to the miscarriage(s) with emotions such as sadness (85%), grief (63%) and shock (58%).

58% said they struggled to concentrate, 47% reported sleep problems, and 48% said it affected their work. However, 46% of partners didn’t share all of how they were feeling with their wife or girlfriend for fear of saying the wrong thing or causing her further distress. 22% didn’t talk about any feelings of loss and pain with their partner.

Ruth Bender Atik, National Director of the Miscarriage Association, said:
“These findings show that partners often feel invisible during and after miscarriage or ectopic pregnancy. Many keep their real feelings hidden from their wife or girlfriend for fear of saying the wrong thing or causing more distress. Friends and family often ask how the woman who has miscarried is coping, but never think to ask her partner.

“All too often the voices of partners go unheard, and their needs go unmet. We want this campaign to highlight their stories, showing partners that they are not alone in their feelings and telling them where they can find support. We want them to be considered rather than sidelined during and after pregnancy loss.”

In the interviews, male partners frequently referred to the expectation that they would be strong for their partners. One respondent said: “It was an experience that we went through together, and I believe that she is the only other person who understands what I feel. However, there is certainly a pressure (either perceived or real) that as a male it is important to be strong and supportive for the other person, which can be hard.”

While the majority of the interview respondents who used healthcare services as part of the miscarriage were positive about the help and care they received, there were still problems identified for some partners – particularly around information and support post miscarriage.

22% partners felt excluded by healthcare staff, 38% were not offered additional information about what was going on, 63% said they were not told of any support groups or services for people who had experienced miscarriage and 13% were distressed by hospitals continuing to send letters about antenatal care after the miscarriage.

Dr Petra Boynton (UCL Medical School), who undertook the research, said:
“While the emotional impact on women who experience pregnancy loss is well­ researched, much less is known about partners. We set out to talk to as many as possible to find out both their experiences of pregnancy loss and what they needed to cope during and after miscarriage.

“We discovered, contrary to the limited existing research, that partners DO want to talk about miscarriage. While some described having to fill a role of being ‘strong’ for the woman who miscarried, most really want to talk about their experiences, but struggle to find a way to do this.

“The miscarriage often affected their friendships, work, and physical and mental wellbeing. Although they wanted to have someone to talk to or care for them they said they did not feel able to ask for help from friends, family or their employers and those people didn’t seem aware partners might be upset or in need of support.”

The main things partners said would help them included:
● hearing other people’s stories and experiences (not just during and immediately after miscarriage but months and years after the loss)
● information via books, websites and leaflets about what miscarriage is, sources of support, and how best to support a wife or girlfriend
● active forums and easy to find websites that obviously welcome partners
● having information available in places like hospitals and GP surgeries, but also places like barbers, pubs etc.
● having health care professionals speak to partners as well as the women going through the miscarriage(s), particularly for lesbian partners
● having friends or family check if they were okay and offering them support while they were caring for their wife or girlfriend

The experiences detailed by partners as part of the research have been turned into materials to support the Partners Too campaign. These include films of their stories read by actors, cartoons and information leaflets.






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